


Advice

by AnselaJonla



Series: Prompt fills [15]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-08-17 02:05:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16507271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnselaJonla/pseuds/AnselaJonla
Summary: A fic written for a prompt on the r/WritingPrompts subreddit:[WP] You are a Financial Adviser in a fantasy world with elves, dwarves, orcs, goblins, etc. Your clients often make highly questionable expenses... It's your job to steer them in the right direction and clean up their spending habits.





	Advice

"You bought  _what_?" I exclaimed, rather more harshly than I intended. My client, a rather mild-mannered halfling, shrank back in his seat. And this meeting had been going so well. He'd actually made sensible financial choices since his latest windfall.

"Well, I wasn't going to, but then I remembered that my cousin Ophelia has been after a dining table just like that one for  _ages_ , and after what she said about my hobbies, and her insinuations about my relationship with Drarin, I just  _knew_  I had to get that elf-carved fifty seat party table with matching dwarf-forged cutlery and crockery. Those crafters only collaborate about once a decade, assuming their kingdoms aren't at war again of course. She's going to be green with envy at next week's party."

Ah yes. The mild-mannered halfling who had a fondness for adventuring with Drarin, the king of the Dwarven Realm, who was 'absolutely and completely  _just a friend_ '. Apparently he had a knack for killing bandits in their sleep, or slipping poison into their food or beer, and other underhanded methods of eliminating those that stood between his 'friend' and lost or stolen dwarven treasures.

"Well, I can account for this in your budget, Mr Raffins. Just please refrain from any more extravagant purchases in the name of one upmanship, at least until you've found a few more treasures."

"Well there's no chance of  _that_  any time soon," he huffed. "Randil declared war on Drarin again. Something about dwarven hunters following a deer into Randil's lands."

He stood up and smiled. "Thank you for your time, and your advice is much appreciated. I'll see you next month."

I look at my list of remaining appointments for the day. The uncrowned exile king of the southern human kingdom, who could take the throne  _at any time_ , but preferred the life of an itinerant wanderer was up next, probably wanting advice on how to cope with the recent increase in campground fees in the Blasted Lands. Then I had the leader of the largest orc warband in said Lands, who was responsible for the increase in fees; he owned all of the campgrounds, having recently... acquired the last few holdouts whose former owners had been unwilling to sell. Hmmmmm.

"Janice," I shouted into reception. "Please keep his unwashed highness and Arog apart, I don't want a repeat of last time."

"Already on it," she shouted back.

After that it was a housecall. Draug the Slightly-Dangerous had received tribute from the village below, and was looking to expand his portfolio. Maybe this time I could convince him to invest in something a bit more sensible than a sheep farm in a desert.  _That_  had been a miserable failure.


End file.
